Friday, December 28, 2007

"Your story doesn't sound real"

My post on ""No" at the mall" has elicited a good number of comments, and a good number of emails as well.

Some don't believe that my experience "really happened." Well, it was kind of unreal. Bordering on surreal. But real, nevertheless.

Why would someone doubt it? There are bad parents out of there of "normal kids" (does anyone even have normal kids anymore?), there are bad parents of gifted kids, and there are bad parents of special needs kids. Because one has a special needs child does not automatically qualify one for Parent of the Year. Too many of them are abused, neglected, and in foster care. My hat is off to any parent who is doing their job well of raising their kids, special needs or not.

One comment in the post ""No" at the mall" told how her boyfriend's parents apparently didn't do such a great job of raising their Down Syndrome son, and now want their other son to take care of the brother when the parents are no longer able. Is that person making up her story?

Sticking our heads in the sand helps no one. Crappy parents have all kinds of kids. Even gifted kids. A relative of mine has 2 gifted kids (according to the public school system). I know more about the "problems" of gifted kids than I want to know. I'm regaled at family get togethers over the last round at the school, everything the mother talks about has to do with her gifted kids and their education. It's like a cult-thing. But these gifted kids (8 and 11) have yet to manage such basic manners as "please" and "thank you." They can't seem to figure out what that napkin is for, that older people and ladies go first, and that one does not fart at table.

All of this reminds me of an article that I read some years ago, written by John Rosemond. It describes parents who raised their Down Syndrome son to be responsible, instead of babying him and making his life such that he would be a burden to his future guardians.

Article: Parenting at its best

4 comments:

Phoena said...

I believe the story, just becuase breeders are always doing unreal things and behaving outrageously.

I was walking through the parking lot of a busy store recently. Some gal was trying to load her kids into her super-sized van and the doors were wide open. Walking by I looked in her direction and she saw me and freaked out and yelled at me! WTF? I wasn't even staring or glaring -- it was a glance and I didn't even look for long. People are fucking insane these days!!

Anonymous said...

Given this update and the timing of the update, I find the original story even less credible.

"Methinks the Lady doth protest too much."

The behaviours described in the original post seem very unlike typical aspie behaviours. The stereotypical aspie child is a "little professor" with poor muscle tone and rigid adherence to rules. Because aspies have no language delay, we respond to verbal instruction even at a young age.

If the anecdote had involved rudeness like interrupting a conversation or if the anecdote had involved a meltdown or rage, I would have found it much more credible.

At best, the anecdote propagates an ignorant and inaccurate image of aspies dreamed up by a dysfunctional and permissive mother. At worst, it's a simple fiction by an anonymous author intended to defame us.

Either way, the anecdote is best ignored because it was never worth writing in the first place.

Mark Shaw said...

There is absolutely nothing incredible about these stories. It's the usual behavior of the typical modern breeder-sow: ME ME ME expressed vicariously via her pwecious widdle snowflakes.

I had the lovely experience of having a little girl scramble over the top of my disabled girlfriend's luggage at the airport a couple of weeks ago, between us and the carousel, to get at a piece of her own luggage that was coming her way anyway. She even broke a piece of plastic off one of our bags on her way back. What did we get in the way of apology or even acknowledgment from her clueless handler? A cold, angry stare!

Clean up your acts, parents. If you want to regain any of the respect you had in previous eras, that is....

Anonymous said...

My take was that the child did not act like an Aspie at all, but rather than doubt the story I just decided the mother probably invented the disability for the purpose of excusing all of her child's horrible behavior. Maybe one of her friends has a true Aspie and she self-diagnosed the boy and became very interested in their "rights" when it turned out that people would bend over backwards to let the little shit walk all over them if they thought he had a disability.

Imagining secret motives is fun and all, but there's no way to tell whether the blogger made the story up or the mother made the disability up, so we must believe what we choose to believe.