Readers write...

Below are excerpts from my email, used with permission of the writers. I'll post more later.

Dear Anonymous Parent,

Thanks for your blog! Here's what happened over our Thanksgiving holiday:

My cousin is in Iraq this year, so we invited his wife and their 3 kids to stay with us for four days. Our kids are nearly grown, and we don't expect perfection from kids. We know that they are naturally louder and more energetic than older folks. I didn't take into account for spoiled rotten, however. A few instances: On the first morning I asked the girl (age 5) if she wanted milk or juice with her breakfast. She replied milk, so I gave her a cup of milk. She tasted it and spit it out all over the table. Thinking it was spoiled, I tasted it and it was fine. She cried that it wasn't what she was used to. Her mom warms it in the microwave with a teaspoon of honey. No one told me, and mom was still asleep.

The boys (7.5 year old twins) asked for soda for breakfast. I told them that I don't keep soda in the house. They said well can't you go out and get some? I told them that the next time I went to the store that I would pick up some soda. But they could have milk or juice. They drank the juice but made rude comments about not having soda.

The 5 year old girl never flushed the toilet when she was done. She did wash her hands, however. But she turned the faucets on full-force and made a mess, which of course she didn't clean up.

The boys would tease the dog and try to take his food away from him, and he'd growl and snap at them. I started feeding the dog on the screened porch, and they'd still go out and tease him. I had a talk with mom before something happened. I didn't want anyone to get bitten.

Mom said that since their dad had been deployed four months earlier, the kids wouldn't listen to her. I told her that I loved having them for the holiday, but that there had to be some rules and routine because I was being worn out taking care of their messes and putting up with their rudeness and backtalk. She replied "Well, why did you invite us here if you didn't want us?"

The next few days were hard. Mom pretty much left the kids to me (I couldn't blame her much, she'd been the only parent for four months, and many more months to come she'd be the only parent). My husband and two kids (17 and 19) helped with the cooking and cleaning. But it was difficult living with 4 people who spoke so rudely and demandingly to us. I feel sorry for those kids, if they aren't taught some manners soon, and learn how to be grateful, it will be hard for them. And as you write, hard on society!

Thanks for your blog!
-Anonymous

I don't know if you want to print this but if you do, you have my permission. My brother and his wife came to visit us on Thanksgiving day. They brought their kids, a 4 year old boy and an 8 year old boy. The den where the TV is located is just off of the kitchen. While I was cooking dinner, the boys would complain that I was making "too much racket" and they couldn't hear the TV! Their mom actually asked me if I could "keep it down a little" so they could hear. I told her that I could use some help in the kitchen and that she could mash the potatoes. Since the mixer made too much noise, I told her she could use a spoon or something. She said well, why don't we mash the potatoes when their show is over? I should have done that and served them cold potatoes!
-Anonymous

I'm a PNB! And proud of it!

I received an email from a reader who said that my blog was refreshing "coming from a PNB." I didn't know what a PNB was, so I Googled it and learned that a PNB "Stands for “Parent, Not Breeder” – in other words, a good parent, not a shitty parent. As in: “My brother is a PNB”

The reverse is "BNP -- Stands for “Breeder, Not Parent” Some people use the term BNP instead of “Breeder” because it sounds less insulting. It basically refers to a bad parent (in contrast to “PNB” – a good parent.)

These definitions, and more, are located at this website: Happily Childfree/Glossary of terms

Warning: Not for the humor impaired! Dear Parent, please read these definitions. Even some of us PNB's agree with the terms. Such as "Mommyism -- A form of feminism that focuses on getting special rights for mommies and screwing over childfree women and men in the process. Example: Mommies want flextime in the office, but don't think anyone but them should get it."

I've seen women in the grocery store, kids in tow, deciding that the line was too long for them to wait and, if no one would give in to their sighs and rude stares, they'd walk out with their hot prepared foods muttering "I'll pay for it next time." Yeah, right. And like the rude mommies who've just picked their kids up from daycare after work and make rude comments about those of us there sans child "Why can't those people shop earlier in the day?" They bitch that "we" (anyone without a kid with them) make life harder for them because we don't shop when it is convenient for them! The same ones who proclaim that stay at home mommies are letting their brains go to mush, but then ask the mush-brains to run errands, close windows if it rains, and wait for packages and deliverymen!

And don't even get me started on mommies who have their kids names hanging on their necklaces, their license plates, their screen names, and so on. It is easy to see who rules those roosts! Parents, once you become parents, do you suddenly forget that you have a spouse (if indeed you have one, of course)? Do you forget that you were a person before you had kids, with hobbies, interests besides what color Bratney's poop is, or what age Rotney toilet trained??? Parents, act like you have a brain! Cut the cutesy sing song voice, ditch the "mama2joey" screen name, the "4kds4me" license plate. Read a book with more than 20 words in it, read a newspaper, go to museums. Have a life!